The dirty little secrets to alpha male body language to attract women
When it comes to male body language, the empirical research is not nearly as advanced as that of women’s. There’s a reason for this; men aren’t typically thought of as users of body language to signal attraction in the same way that women do.
Well, because men are by design, the aggressors. They are the ones tasked with the difficult job of being direct, approaching and soliciting.However, if men are smart, they usually wait around in the vicinity to see if women will send them cues which indicate mutual interest, then make their move. In other words, women should use signals to show men that they are interested and then ease back and let men be more direct.
If he hasn’t approached you yet, you should add more hints .
Bottom line is that if he’s interested, he’ll get the hint, sooner or later. And if he doesn’t? Well you could always take the risk and ask him out!
So, to address the real reason that you’re here – namely because he hasn’t yet approached you, but you’re in a bit of a stalemate because you’re shy and so is he, then here are over 56 body language cues to consider that will help you decide if he’s interested.
As it turns out, a thorough and comprehensive review of the scientific literature has produces a myriad of ways that men actively use and signal sexual interest. We here at BLP have produced, perhaps the most comprehensive list in existence (and it wasn’t easy)!
Research (see citations below) says that men signal through direct glances, maximizing space movements, touching other males and open body movements, amongst many others. Men can use nonverbal cues in courtship to signal status, health, prowess, as well as interest and friendliness. These are all important signals in a time constraint courtship setting. Lastly, auto-manipulation might signal the level of anxiousness a man feels in the presences of women he finds attractive. This is not unlike the well studied courtship cues of grooming and auto-contact present in women.
But there’s more, read on!
She does a great job teaching you the skills of reading others in just a couple of hours. Feel free to leave us a comment below!
1. He Makes Eye Contact. Does he look back at you when he’s walking away? Do you catch him stealing a glance from afar? If you catch him looking at you, does he quickly look away and pretend to by busy (but really isn’t)? If a guy likes you but he’s shy, he’ll find it difficult to ignore you, but at the same time, he’ll be driven to check you out. However, he wont want to seem creepy or desperate so he’ll try to avoid getting caught looking.
Men won’t waste their time look at the undesirable! If a man maintains eye contact or gazes for longer than usual – this is a signal of intimacy (it violate the “moral looking time”).
Men will use eye contact in an effort to get you to notice him. Research has found that women feel uncomfortable when men approach without them first noticing them – this is a way for him to nonverbally say “hello” without being too forthright. More detail is available in this study.
2. He Avoids Eye Contact. Yeah sounds like a contradiction, but when men are shy and are hesitant to make the first move, talking with a girl face-to-face, rather than at a distance like in #2, will force men to break eye contact. Why do shy guys avoid eye contact? Because it makes them feel uncomfortable. See this study.
3. His Eyes Wander to Your Body. This is a tricky one because it only happens early on. Research has found that when men and women are intimately interested, they will check out each other’s body. Most of the time men and women make eye contact with each other, but when they are friends, this happens nearly exclusively. However, when men and women are sexually interested, they will make eye forays to the rest of the body. Have a friend check his eye gaze while the two of you talk and then again as you leave. If he likes you, he’s going to discretely check your body out as you leave (think: your butt) and when you’re talking, but look away briefly, he’s going to check out your boobs.
Just how compelled he is to do this will tell you how sexually attracted he is to you.
4. He’s Joyful and Smiles and Laughs a Lot. Does he make eye contact with you and then send you a gentle smile? Perhaps he tries to make you laugh. This is a sign that he’s trying to build a connection with you. When you smile, does he smile back? When a guy smiles at your jokes even when they aren’t funny, he’s tuned into you. He may also be more animated, more talkative and more expressive. Research has found that men will stifle negative emotions such as frowning when they think an attractive girl is watching him!
5. He’ll Try to Get Close to You and Lean in. If a guy likes you he’ll try to shrink the distance between the two of you. He will show this by leaning in or standing close to you – even if there is plenty of room otherwise. If seated, he’ll perch at the edge of his seat as if hanging off your every word. He might even try to get some alone time – even briefly (like standing in the elevator, or in line, or at your work station). Men will try to create incidental contact to improve the chances that you and he might open a dialogue.
If he’s actively trying to isolate you for a private moment, even in a public space, he’s probably interested in more than just being friends (some argue that men and women simply can’t ever be friends – so if you’ve got a guy friend, chances are that he digs you, even if you haven’t yet gone there.)
Careful though, really shy guys will actually do the opposite and especially respectful guys will even give you plenty of space rather than encroach on you. This doesn’t always mean that he’s not interested, he’s just giving you enough room to make up your own mind about him without being disrespectful or off-putting.
6. A Random Approach. When a guy comes up to a girl, it’s usually because he likes her or at least finds her cute or attractive. This can sometimes happen in random locations or by complete strangers. Think bar or nightclub, but also coffee shops, on the street, or in the mall. If a guy takes the time to come to you, he probably thinks you’re cute enough to invest some time in getting to know, and is studying the possibilities of something more than friendship.
7. He Shows Off. Sometimes guys get a little goofy when they like a girl and do silly things to attract attention. Bragging is one way men use to signal higher worth to women. Showing off in sports, talking about achievements and so forth are ways that men try to signal interest by displaying higher social worth. A man might sneak in a funny joke, or text or do a silly dance, or make a funny face. Sometimes this comes off as just exaggerated behaviour. Anything to try to make a girl laugh!
8. His Voice Deepens. Research has found that when men try to appeal to women, they drop the tone of their voce to sound more masculine and dominant. Thankfully, it’s likely that you’ll find this attractive too. So keep an ear out for the guy who drops his voice noticeable when you’re around. The researchers found that this tends to create the impression that they are more caring and understanding.